1000 Miles & Running

They say health is wealth, and running is good for the soul, so I tried to get a piece of the action. Although it’s been a couple months since my last blog, the narrative remains the same, control what you can control. There have been so many things out of our control this year, from a global pandemic that has tragically taken the lives of so many, to a divisive president constantly spewing White supremacist rhetoric with an administration that empowers this behavior, to social injustices plastered daily on our screens. This is the type of injustice that made Marvin Gaye want to holler, and it sure enough made me want to as well. In fact, I did, on many occasions. One of the things that has helped me during such a chaotic year is running, and although I have done some significant reflection during this time, and have felt so many emotions, I thought it would be beneficial to touch and four that stand out to me: Growth, Healing, Sustainability, and Discipline.

Growth

Growth comes in all forms, from hardships, and also from putting yourself out there. Over the past five years, I have grown quite accustomed to just putting myself out there and going for it, whether it be trying to reach out to people or advocating for things I may have not felt confident enough to speak out about in the past. This has worked in my favor, regardless of the outcome. Even if it could be seen as a loss, I choose to look at it as a learning situation. This mindset was something that I had May 22, 2019, as I sat in my apartment having just completed my 4th year of undergrad, with one more semester coming that Fall. I thought to myself, I had not run in almost four years, so I knew that my legs would itch like crazy! But I had told myself that I was going to run, and with no exact mileage in mind, I just decided to run past the point of my legs itching, which it inevitably did, on my first three consecutive runs. Upon the completion of each of these runs, I saw that I had ran the equivalent of two miles. After about two weeks in, I decided why not make it three! After about a month of this, I decided to take it to four miles, and this has been my sweet spot since mid-June of last year. This growth has been significant, just in regard to how I deal and respond to people on a daily basis. It has always reminded me that no matter what people think or say to you, you have the power to control what you can.

Running Through the Pain (Healing)

George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery, these were just a few of the names that would constantly flood through my mind this summer as I would run in my majority White neighborhood. When the early stages of the pandemic began, I moved back home to Grosse Pointe in early April, the first time I had been here for such a significant amount of time. Although I was consulting at MSU, my time in East Lansing had mainly came to an end. For me, this was a sense of excitement, a new chapter as a graduate student at an Ivy League institution! However, although being back home with my family was wonderful, it made me reflect on my experiences growing up in this city, which was far from wonderful. From racially traumatic experiences that occurred in 5th grade including being told to go back to the ghetto and threatened to be shot because I was Black, to just navigating many classes as a Black male and always feeling the pressure to feeling that I had to be the spokesperson for Black people, to aggressively scrubbing my skin because I had learned to hate my blackness due to all the racism I endured, to just isolating myself. There is an African proverb saying, “A child that is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth”. As a 12-year-old, I had begun to grow spots grey hair due to the stress and because I felt no love or support from my new village of Grosse Pointe, outside of my parents. This African proverb resonated with me, because although I excelled academically and athletically by the undying support of my parents and grace of God, I never felt that I belonged here, never felt welcomed here, and always felt that I was used for my athletic ability and constantly stared at as just a Black outsider. When I went to MSU, there was a significant amount of healing that had to take place due to all the mental trauma that I had endured that began to affect me physically from my time in Grosse Pointe. So, four and a half years removed from Grosse Pointe with MSU under my belt, I returned to a city I never had love for but had been able to take all that negative energy and pain and turn it into something positive during my time at MSU in my attempt that nobody would ever have to feel the way that I felt. I, however, came back to this city with accolades, a supportive village, and unwavering confidence because I had come back stronger than ever. During my first few runs, however, I would have flashbacks of living here, thoughts of being shot by the police or someone like Ahmaud Arbery, and although it even brought tears to my eyes when running occasionally, I kept running, because I was determined that nothing would stop me from finishing my run. It was during these 4-mile runs that I had my own time; time to heal, time to reflect, and time to remind myself that I would persevere regardless of what was in my way. It allowed me to have the energy to come back to this community and help my father as a campaign manager for his re-election, as the first and still only African American in our five cities history on the Grosse Pointe School Board. While his re-election is significant not just for me but for others, it is just the beginning of the potential in change that has the possibility of occurring here. Just as I had in done at MSU, this healing was intentional and hard, but needed.

Sustainability

You can’t pour from an empty cup. This is something that I have often been reminded, whether it be from family or mentors, and it is a quote that I consistently remind myself of. After you, there will be somebody else, so while it is important to show love and give to others, make sure you give to yourself as well. One of the ways in which I would begin to give to myself was by plugging my Air Pods in and going for those 4-mile runs almost daily. Even in the midst of healing, there was something so therapeutic about running to me. I would often feel recharged and energized after running, and this has proven to be significant component in assisting me with my current graduate studies and other commitments. Running has sustained me in every area of my life, and it has become a joy that I often look at to just get away from things, if even just for a few seconds.

Discipline

While I ran for physical component, I really ran to exercise the mind. In fact, in my 1,000 miles of running, I neither gained nor lost a pound, as this was not a goal. My goal was just to get out there to get some running in and also see where it went. However, I began running in May of last year, and there were days when it would be hot, but I would still get out there and run. It should be noted that I had no intentions of running 1,000 miles, as I only planned to run the summer of last year to just add another layer of consistency to my daily life. Well, I happened to be in for a surprise, because I saw the extra bit of discipline that came with running. I have always considered myself disciplined, but this running just further assisted with this characteristic, which I needed at the time to focus on finishing my fifth year strong and applying to graduate schools. After completing my final semester year and successfully applying to graduate programs, however, I decided to keep this energy going, because why knock it if it works? I’m not one to fix something that isn’t broke, so it looks like running will continue to be my go-to. It has allowed me to grow, helped me heal, provided sustainability, and an extra supplement of discipline. I have learned that the more discipline you have, the more freedom you have.

While running may not be your thing, I would encourage you, if you have not, to think about things that allow you to grow, heals, sustains, and helps with discipline. If you’re still stuck on ideas, then reach out! I’m always down to talk. Until next time! Peace & Love <3.